and so I wait….. November 7, 2008

So basically,

Waiting for my cyst to go away, CHECK!

Waiting for my period to come, CHECK!!

Waiting to ovulate, NOT YET

So I got my period on Tuesday, it actually made my day!!! So next week on Thursday I´ll start using my OPK, and basically wait to get a positive, call my Ob, start progesterone shots for 2 weeks, and test……. Here´s hoping i do ovulate this cycle, since the last one I was taking BCP, and that might have screwed up a little my cicle…

After my miscarriage I was desperately needing to find support anywhere…So I started reading several blogs, from so many women, and it was amazing the support I felt….I felt I was understood….I felt it was ok to feel what I was feeling…i knew it was ok to still feel the heartache after several months….most of all, I knew I was not ALONE…..I made this blog, so I could talk about I was going through and to let all my feelings out…..I do not talk about this process I´m going through with a lot of people…It´s only mostly this blog, my DH, my mom and sister, and 3 friends who are currently and have been struggling to get pregnant….. So if you´re also struggling you´ll know  that it isn´t easy for me to talk about this with my friends who already have kids, or that had it really easy getting pregnant, without them thinking I´m stressing out about it… So yesterday I had lunch with a really close friend, and she asked me how everything was going, and If I was TTC again, after my miscarraige….and she made me remember why I DON´T talk about this…. So I tell her that basically my OB thinks I might have a short luteal phase (I obviously have to explain to her what that is, since she´s never heard of it before), and that I will be needing prog. shots after I ovulate, etc etc etc…..and she goes on to tell me that MY problem is that I´m stressing out, and that I´m planning too much!, that I need to be relaxed, not think about, and just let things happen…..mmmmhh??? so, I try to explain to her as politely as I can, that I might have a prog. deficiency, to fix that I NEED to get progesteron shots, and for that I NEED to track ovulation, and for that I NEED to use OPK…so yes, I think it´s not so easy to NOT think about it, when I have to use a daily OPK until I get a + , and since after that, I will probably be SORE AS HELL, from getting daily prog. shots….so yes, I think is IMPOSSIBLE, to not think about it!!!   and this is why I don´t talk to people about it!!!!!  anyways just a little rant, I just hate people makng me feel as if it´s my fault and I´m not pregnant or as if I´m stressing to much about it…..and this is why I started this blog, cause it´s one of the only places where I actually feel understood!!

So, anyways, have a GREAT WEEKEND!!

L