TWW??? November 24, 2008

So not sure but I might be on my first TWW since my miscarriage…. My OPK was positive on Sunday, CD20, and my temp had a rise on sunday morning and today….I´m thinking yesterdays rise was because of me getting a cold….and today, not sure if it´s that I ovulated or still the cold….not sure what to think, but I´ve decided not to stress about it, since everything i could do it´s done….so I now have to get a progesterone test on 7DPO, and we´ll se if we start the progesterone shots……so not much to do but wait , and try to be as stress free as I can……DH has been reminding me that this is our first try, and it might take us several months, and that is perefectly normal….of course I really really hope is as soon as it can be, but I have to be pacient and hopeful that ít´ll happen soon……

L

Soooooo confused!!! HELP November 23, 2008

So I´ve been doing the OPK since CD 12, yesterday it was CD19 and I had totally lost hope, and thought this might be a cycle without ovulation, maybe because of the BCP of last month….so Yesterday the result of my OPK was clearly negative at 2:00, but if you looked really close you could see that the top of the line was slightly darker than the rest of the line, but I´ve read that the line has to be AS DARK or darker than the reference line…..Also since yesterday I´ve been feeling like I´m getting a cold, and my throat has been really really sore…So today I take my temp as usual, and is higher, so inmediately think that I maybe ovulated yesterday, but then, I might be getting sick, so don´t know…..Anyways I decided to take an OPK, and I think it is now positive (I´m attaching a pic, tell me what you think!), it is as dark as the reference line especially on the left border of the line…..sooooooooooo, here´s the dilemma did I ovulate yesterday, or I ´m about to ovualte and the temp rise was beacuse of my sore throat???? AS you can see I can´t stop thinking about it, mainly because if I´m about to ovuate, I BD this morning so I think I´m covered, but if I ovulated yesterday SAturday, I BD on thursday night but couldn´t on friday and saturday!!!! Anywasy, I´m calling my ob tomorrow, see what he thinks and I guess I´ll start the progesterone shots tomorrow!!!!!!! WISH ME LUCk, and hopefully I´m about to ovualte today!!!!

sooooooooo confused!!!! HELP November 23, 2008

Hating OPK´s…. November 19, 2008

 So, I´m on CD 16….still no positive OPK….on my last 5 cycles i´ve been ovulating between days 14 and 16…Only after my miscarriage I had a late ovulation on CD 26…..so not sure whats going on…..I think it might be that I was on BCP last month…Maybe ovaries are taking their sweet time to ovualate!!! don´t know, but I´m getting a little bit frustrated of POAS every day, to see a very very faint line…..so I guess I´ll have to wait, and I hope I DO ovulate this cycle…..I´ve been getting more CM since yesterday so hopefully that must be a sign that it´s coming…..I guess what´s stressing me out is that I need to know exactly when I ovulate, if I ovulate, so I can call my OB and start the progesterone shots1!!! so , I hope tomorrow I´ll have better news!!!!  Keep me in your prayers!!

Hope everyone is doing great!!!

 

L

OPK & PIO November 18, 2008

So basically I´m just waiting to get a positive OPK….I was just checking FF and for the past months I´ve been ovulating between day 14 or 16….Right now I´m on cd14…so far the line on the OPK has been really really faint….so I don´t know if this cycle will be as the other ones, or if this will be somewhat different due to the fact that I was on BCP last cycle, trying to get rid of my cyst, which I thankfully did!…..so I´ve also heard of some women doing opk´s twice a day, so they don´t miss the surge….so I thought I might start doing that!!! any advise on opk´s????? so, there´s not much I can do, but wait for a + test, and BD every other day!!!!    I´ve also been looking for info about PIO shots (Progesterone in Oil), I will be starting this after I ovulate, since my Ob thinks I have a short luteal phase (11 days) and might have a prog. deficiency….I was actually pretty scared of this shots, since my tolerance to pain is not very good…So I found some interesting videos on you tube, and after seeing a bunch of them I´m not as scared and actually I´ve found very good tips on how to try to make it as pain free as possible…what amazes me is that some of them are actually giving the shots themselves!!!!! I´m so scared of needles that I don´t know if I´ll be able to, and thankfully DH has agreed to do them….so here are some of the links in case you´re interested….

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=y4KSCI7xSMo

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FGjZm5uXwy4&feature=related

and so I wait….. November 7, 2008

So basically,

Waiting for my cyst to go away, CHECK!

Waiting for my period to come, CHECK!!

Waiting to ovulate, NOT YET

So I got my period on Tuesday, it actually made my day!!! So next week on Thursday I´ll start using my OPK, and basically wait to get a positive, call my Ob, start progesterone shots for 2 weeks, and test……. Here´s hoping i do ovulate this cycle, since the last one I was taking BCP, and that might have screwed up a little my cicle…

After my miscarriage I was desperately needing to find support anywhere…So I started reading several blogs, from so many women, and it was amazing the support I felt….I felt I was understood….I felt it was ok to feel what I was feeling…i knew it was ok to still feel the heartache after several months….most of all, I knew I was not ALONE…..I made this blog, so I could talk about I was going through and to let all my feelings out…..I do not talk about this process I´m going through with a lot of people…It´s only mostly this blog, my DH, my mom and sister, and 3 friends who are currently and have been struggling to get pregnant….. So if you´re also struggling you´ll know  that it isn´t easy for me to talk about this with my friends who already have kids, or that had it really easy getting pregnant, without them thinking I´m stressing out about it… So yesterday I had lunch with a really close friend, and she asked me how everything was going, and If I was TTC again, after my miscarraige….and she made me remember why I DON´T talk about this…. So I tell her that basically my OB thinks I might have a short luteal phase (I obviously have to explain to her what that is, since she´s never heard of it before), and that I will be needing prog. shots after I ovulate, etc etc etc…..and she goes on to tell me that MY problem is that I´m stressing out, and that I´m planning too much!, that I need to be relaxed, not think about, and just let things happen…..mmmmhh??? so, I try to explain to her as politely as I can, that I might have a prog. deficiency, to fix that I NEED to get progesteron shots, and for that I NEED to track ovulation, and for that I NEED to use OPK…so yes, I think it´s not so easy to NOT think about it, when I have to use a daily OPK until I get a + , and since after that, I will probably be SORE AS HELL, from getting daily prog. shots….so yes, I think is IMPOSSIBLE, to not think about it!!!   and this is why I don´t talk to people about it!!!!!  anyways just a little rant, I just hate people makng me feel as if it´s my fault and I´m not pregnant or as if I´m stressing to much about it…..and this is why I started this blog, cause it´s one of the only places where I actually feel understood!!

So, anyways, have a GREAT WEEKEND!!

L

Waiting…STILL September 18, 2008

So, I guess I haven´t been in the mood to write lately….I gues is the fact that there´s no news to report on the TTC department…. I was supposed to get my period, and have done some bloodwork on my 3rd cycle day….so what happened???? welll my body decided to confuse me and my OB….I usually get a day of dark brown spotting before my actual period begins (meaning red bleeding), well this time this spotting lasted for 3 days before I actually got my period…This had never happened before, and obviously my OB asked me not to do the bloodwork, since we were not pretty sure of which was the 3rd cycle day…..We were suposse to be checking closely this past cycle so we could try to see if my luteal phase was in fact short….It was eleven days if I count the spotting days as my period, or 13 If I dont……I´m not sure what happened, maybe i was thinking to much, and stressing to much about luteal phase, I don´t know….So my ob told me to wait for yet another month….The thing is our whole conversation was by telephone…I really don´t like talking to doctors by phone since I feel like they´re not paying attention as I would like them too….So here i am waiting for another month….I know, I know it´s just one more month, and I´m con CD 8 , and with my cycles being 27 days, that´s only 19 days to wait…….I´ve been repeating in my mind that it´s nothing, and that time wil fly by….i´m just tired of waiting, and I want to try again….I think I need to…It´s been 4 months since my miscarriage, at first I really felt no hurry to start trying again, mainly because I felt really scared, but now I´m ready!!!! Also, there are so many people close to me getting pregnant, it´s amazing,…I mean every week I hear of someone I know pregnant!!!  it just makes me feel helpless knowing that I´m ovulating and not being able to do anything about it…..sooo what´s next??? I have an appointment with my OB on October 2nd….we will finally discuss face to face what to do in my next cycle….He probably will want me to get the bloodword done this time….Anyways, here´s hoping time flies by…….and trying not to go crazy in the meantime………….

L

Waiting… July 29, 2008

So, I haven´t been posting lately…Actually there´s not much to report on this side….Still not TTC since I´m currently going through some labs and ultrasounds, since it seems that I MIGHT have a small kidney stone…. I actually have NO pain at all…But some labs showed some cristals which may indicate I have one… Soo, obviously TTC is out of the question until we figure this out….I don´t know, maybe it´s a sign that I should wait a little longer….dont know…I think I´m ovulating as we speak, and it´s very frustrating to know that, and not being able to try this month…..Anyways I´ll find out my results on Monday, hopefully it will be nothing, and I´ll be able to try next month, and if there is something I hope it´s small and it only requires me taking some pills….Here´s hoping…

L

Moving on… July 4, 2008

So, not much has happened lately….mostly going to work, trying to relax, spending time with friends and my husband….It seems like time is flying by…. Also I´ve been paying attention to my cycles…it´s funny how I´ve been having menstrual cycles for 16 years now, and just until now I´ve started to notice all those changes, and symptoms, and cm, etc etc….I´ve been temping for a year now, so I´m pretty sure I ovulated my first cycle after the mc….It somehow makes me feel good that everything is going back to normal…Still waiting for my follow up visit with my OB next Tuesday!! hope everything is where it should be!!  Anyways, hope everyone is having a great week, and for everyone who´s going or has gone through a miscarriage, I just want to say, that it does get better as days go by….It´s just a matter of letting time heal our wounds…and having new dreams, and things to look forward too…

 

L